Chapter 25, Verse 12

“Like a golden nose ring and an ornament of fine gold, so is the reproof of the wise upon a heedful ear.”

Questions:
1)The reproof of a wise person seems valuable in itself. Isn't a golden nose ring just decoration?
2)What is the difference between the reproof of a wise men and reproof of anybody else?
3)Is the pasuk talking about a personality of taking advice from wise people or an action?

We could also ask about the qualities that cause someone to be heedful but I do not think that this is what the pasuk is addressing. The pasuk is telling us what the consequences of having a “heedful ear” are.

Lets try and understand the reproof of a wise person. When would a wise person give reproof? In the pasuk before we said that a true idea must be said in proper context. Part of that is understanding who the audience is.
For example, the Rambam tells us of how to get people at different stages in their lives to study Torah.
To a child we offer candy, to someone older money. If we began offering candy to the adult so that he learns Torah we would probably fail miserably. A chacham will understand this and provide the proper context or incentive for the idea of learning Torah.


On the flip side an adult (not yet developed) wants money. By listening to the chacham and learning, the adult can become rich. However, if the advice were coming from anybody else, then that person may not be able to present the proper context for the advice or the reproof.
The chacham understands context, and will realize that the only effective reproof, is reproof that can also yield a secondary benefit.


This pasuk seems to be giving two ideas
1)how a chacham should give advice.
2)How a person who listens to the chacham's advice can get positive secondary consequences.

Another example for 2: A person smokes because he is interested in maintaining a certain image. A wise person should tell him that he should stop smoking not because of its inherent harm but because it will make his teeth yellow and will be seen as a follower. A person who wants an image will definitely be interested in appearing as a leader (and in appearance) and will be able to achieve the secondary benefit by stopping smoking.

Now, lets see if we can explain the first part of the pasuk according to either of our interpretations.

Mashal
a golden nose ring has two qualities
1)valuable in itself (fine gold) - Primary
2)is decorative and beautifies the person wearing it. - Secondary

Taking the primary value of gold, it can also yield a secondary value of looking good. Even if one is not interested in its primary value, he should still take it for the way that it beautifies the person. That is the secondary benefit that a heedful person will get.
On the flip side, a chacham must be willing to utilize the secondary benefit of gold to get the person to take in something valuable. Its building on the pasuk before, by showing the positive consequence that placing ideas in their proper context can bring. A chacham will be able to perfect those around them by letting the heedful ear take in the secondary value, slowly being drawn in to the true value of the chacham's advice.

Conclusion-
It is still very difficult for me to follow halacha or the Torah lifestyle for its own sake. What gets me motivated is thinking about the different pleasures that I can get, which are not essential, but are definitely there. People often mistake pleasure as being inherently taboo. Such a view creates a conflict between the desires and this feeling of taboo. If I can realize that the Torah lifestyle is the life of pleasure then it will be much more easier for me to make proper decisions and to listen to the advice of the wise.