19:18 - Childish Parenting

משלי יט:יח

יַסֵּר בִּנְךָ כִּי יֵשׁ תִּקְוָה, וְאֶל הֲמִיתוֹ אַל תִּשָּׂא נַפְשֶׁךָ:

Mishlei 19:18 – Childish Parenting

Discipline your son, for there is hope; do not let yourself be swayed by his protest.

There are two factors which dissuade parents from disciplining their children: (1) the feeling that your child is already set in his ways, and there is no hope that he’ll change; (2) the negative feelings triggered by the thought of causing pain and suffering to your child, as expressed by his protesting and crying. Both deterrents stem from a short-sighted perspective. In truth, a young child is not set in his ways, and there is still hope – although things might seem hopeless at the present; his behavior and personality can still be influenced in the long-run by your discipline or lack thereof, for better or for worse. Likewise, your decision to discipline or not discipline your child should be based on long-term objectives and outcomes of parenting – not on the emotional state of your child at present, which will naturally be immature, shortsighted, and resistant to any form of discipline which involves immediate pain and conflict. Ironically, to allow oneself to be dissuaded by either of these two factors is to behave like a child.